Dos and Don'ts for
Parents of Summer Campers
by Mary Jo Rapini, MEd, LPC
The official start of Summer is almost here, and for many
parents
and kids that means summer camp. Many of us grew up with wonderful
memories of summer-filled days at camp. Songs by the campfire, canoe
races and a sundry of other events and new friends fill our minds with
good memories. Today, sending your child to camp involves an understudy
of camping knowledge and skill. There is an every expanding list of
possible camps; general camps and ones that can help enhance any
weakness your child may need help strengthening. It doesn't matter if
your child is going to a baseball camp, math camp, science camp or a
basketball camp, they all have a long list of what kids should and
shouldn't bring. A shorter list is available of dos and don'ts for
parents. |
| Most
camps are meant for kids, not for their parents. However, if you are a
first timer sending your child away to a summer camp, you will note a
heightened sense of anxiety. How do you know if your child will be okay?
Are you sure this camp will address their individual needs? What if
there is an emergency? All sorts of possible crises run through your
mind. There are always things that can happen, but most of them can also
happen almost every day of your child's life --with or without camp.
Your heightened sense of anxiety may, however, affect you and turn you
into a model parent for what NOT to do when your child is at camp. |
Below are a few of the dos and don'ts for being the type of camp parent your child won't be embarrassed to travel home with.
1. Let go and let your child learn
new experiences with trained counselors. Your child has an opportunity
to return from camp feeling accomplished and more self-assured. You can
help facilitate this by reassuring your child before they leave for camp
and reminding them of other times they felt unsure or insecure and did
wonderfully. Also, reassure them you will be there if they need you.
Parents who cannot let go and allow the camp counselors to teach their
children new skills and offer them opportunities stifle their child's
emotional growth.
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2. Communicate with them as appropriate.
Camps have rules about ways and how much to communicate with the
camper. Parents who follow these rules and make sure their child has the
appropriate communication are sending their child the message that they
trust them and have confidence in them. Parents who try to over
communicate, or indulge their child with gifts throughout the week, send
their child the message that they are not like the other kids and need
more attention. This prevents the child from bonding with the other
campers and learning to self soothe when they feel stress or homesick.
Camp counselors are instructed on healthy ways to de-stress children.
Allow your children the opportunity to learn these and more healthy
tips.
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3. Having your child away at camp
can also be a relationship retreat for you and your spouse. Take
advantage of being a couple again and enjoying late dinners or evenings
spent out. When your child comes home full of new experiences to talk
about, you will both be eager to listen. Your relationship will be
stronger and closer. Don't spend the camp week or month feeling anxious
and alone without your child. A camp is an opportunity for both the
child and the parents to grow.
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My
daughters both went to camp and would come home with stories to tell
and memories they still smile and talk about. The experience has them
humming a tune they learned long ago. It was also a wonderful week for
their dad and me. We were able to be a couple again, which restored and
helped our marriage. Summer camps are part of a child's history and one
they will pass on to their children. Ensuring your child has a wonderful
experience begins with embracing the camp, following the rules and
trusting your child's ability--as well as yours--to let go and thrive.
Mary Jo Rapini, MEd, LPC, is a licensed psychotherapist and co-author with Janine J. Sherman, of Start Talking: A Girl's Guide for You and Your Mom About Health, Sex or Whatever. Read more about the book at www.StartTalkingBook.com and more about Rapini at www.maryjorapini.com.
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